Ok, first of all YES IT IS REPETITIVE. I don’t know if he was just chopping and pasting pieces of blogs or filling space or if he really believes men need to hear the information twenty times before they get it (but what do I know? Maybe they do?), but it repeats itself so much. You know, it’s funny, I’m, I’m a pretty sensitive about discussing specificity with his mother, like where I’m not trying to like rehash that so much, but it, but he gets it and he’s, he’s 13. He’s well aware of the work I do now, him and he’s, he gets it. He understands fundamentally that my work’s based on my regrets, that my marriage to his mother didn’t last. And in real time, I’m trying to educate him on lessons and empathy and compassion and mindfulness. Uh, when I see things that pop up, there’s a lot of conversations about racism, about sexism, uh, jokes in movies. Um, even that, like, we, I don’t know if you remember the movie, the sand lot. There’s a joke where a kid insults another kid by saying he plays ball like a girl. And I remember specifically pausing it after that. And we’d both laughed, cuz it’s like funny in the scene, but I wanted him to understand.

This is How Your Marriage Ends spends most of the book repeating the same lesson over and over in as many ways as possible - by not having empathy, you unintentionally hurt your spouse and then invalidate their experience, breaking their trust and straining the relationship. Fray's book serves his target audience (good men who are bad husbands) well, beating them over the head with his central message. However, the constant repetition drove me crazy and Fray's sense of humor wasn't my style. The author is now a relationship coach and apparently many relationships have been saved thanks to his coaching. How many of us have been told by their spouse that they aren't good at planning things but then we see them planning time to enjoy their own hobbies or events with their friends.But, having to carry “Divorced” as your position indefinitely annoys me. I decided to write “Single” because I am not married, and I leave it at that. PDF / EPUB File Name: This_Is_How_Your_Marriage_Ends_-_Matthew_Fray.pdf, This_Is_How_Your_Marriage_Ends_-_Matthew_Fray.epub Hello. Hello, and welcome to in the rising podcast, my name is Bettina brown, and this is the platform I’ve show was to talk about living a life that’s in alignment with your hopes, your dreams and your goals. And you know what? One of the main goals for many of us is to have a fulfilling relationship and a fulfilling From the raw, uncomfortable and darkly humorous stories he shared about the lessons he's learned from his failed marriage comes this strangely hopeful guide to saving relationships. This is How Your Marriage Ends offers immediately actionable advice to help readers identify toxic behaviour patterns in their own lives, and break them out of the cycles of dysfunction that ruin relationships. I will open my review with an analogy. I enjoy ice fishing. If I went ice fishing one day and saw another person running towards me, waving frantically, telling me that the ice was dangerous and that I shouldn't go out I would likely heed his warning because it is in my best interest to do so. Matthew Fray is frantically waving and telling you in his new book that YOU are on thin ice (heed his warning shitty spouses). Matthew fell through the ice and he got divorced; it was an awful experience and he survived but he is warning others not to make the same unintentional mistakes that he did.

I’m not sure he 100% grasps the idea of personal responsibility fully, but I AM 100% sure that if more men did what he suggests, a lot of marriages would be so much stronger, and a lot of women would feel (and BE) more respected, listened to, understood, etc. Sobering and inspiring, heartbreaking and hilarious ... gets to the root of questions that can make or break a life partnership. Read it, heed it, act on it - for yourself and for the one you love' Then something funny (not ha-ha funny, more ironic-funny) happened—people were quarantining together, romantic partners and families, and for the first time in everyone’s lives, most people weren’t getting the space, time away, or diverse social and professional interactions with other people that they were accustomed to. P211 as long as men collectively believe that The Things You Must Do to Have Healthy Relationships are "girl things," then I think heterosexual marriage is doomed.About how we serially invalidate the experiences of those we love. About how we defend our character when the real problem is our behavior. About how we fail to love and respect ourselves in healthy ways. About how we fail to know—to REALLY KNOW—the people we claim to love the most. About how we fail to consider them each and every day when we make choices. About how we often don’t notice how lonely and neglected and abandoned a person feels when they’re made to feel so unimportant that we don’t even make it a priority to include them in our everyday decisions. I will be honest, I read the title of this book, and thought to myself, “okay, Matthew Fray, tell me what went wrong in my marriage!”

This book was written by someone whose marriage ended, as a result of his boorish behavior. Essentially, he was a manchild and his wife eventually was like, I've had enough, thank you very much. And what, what, what you talk about is in, in your book several times is that you mention, yeah, the, the dish in real life really does not matter, but what it represents to that other person and to be able to distinguish the difference is quite important. And that takes some where you said, put yourself in your partner shoes. You know, if it, if there’s that one thing, you know, triggers them, then it is okay to behave in a way that it doesn’t even become a trigger for them. It shows kindness and it shows caring in many different ways. And you put that in. I show, I love you by doing this, this, this, it’s not just words. Discover the captivating origins and hidden meanings of the flags that we all know today in this sparkling tour through this universal subject! I think I can wrap my head around someone being widowed for life. But, even these individuals have the opportunity to find joy and love again and marry.This author reminds me so much of Mark Manson. Which is ironic because it's the author's favorite author. So how much of him is he ripping off? That's the real question.

How many of you have confided in your spouse only to be told you are too sensitive or are overreacting? Couples’ therapists explain that having a difference in values can be something big that ends a relationship. The key is to talk those differences out, respect them, and compromise on things in your new life together. 4. Keeping secrets from one anotherOne of the things I found most interesting from the book, but also in general is the Holmes-Rahe Stress Inventory Scale. These two psychologists studied how different life events stressed people out differently. The number one stressor: is the death of a spouse. The second highest stressor is divorce. Which, is actually the death of the spouse but they are still alive- and so are you. Matthew Fray went viral a few years ago with a blog post about how little things had -- um -- frayed his marriage until it broke. There were some big things too, but what it had come down to, he finally figured out, was that he had consistently not respected his wife's feelings. He had, without ever really meaning to, thoughtlessly ignored what she tried to communicate.